Zoning out

Suffered a heavy bout of insomnia yesterday and could only sleep at 0330 or so. There wasn’t anything troubling me though, and life has been pretty carefree since exams ended. Holidays had been spent partly on CHP with me not contributing much, partly on preparing for electives. I guess it’s not a bad thing to fly a week later than everyone else. I can slowly work out my expenses, slowly pack and buy the things I need, which isn’t a lot in the first place cos Singapore’s weather is similar to Indonesia. Compared to other people flying to colder and further places, I have it easy. Plus my elective is funded.

Starting to look forward to the trip a little again. 🙂 Hopefully it’ll be fun. I was just thinking of how I’ll feel post-electives. It’s weird for me to jump the gun. But in any case, I ended up looking back on all that happened in year 3 instead. M2 suddenly seems like such a distant memory, and whatever prior felt like part of some childhood memory already. M3 reminds me of the obstacle courses thing I had to do back in primary school PE, which at the starting point, I was already quite reluctant to do cos it’s just… not what I can imagine myself doing. But somehow I always have to do it anyway. At the end of it, I realise I escaped unscathed and… no, still don’t want to go back and do it again.

I suppose what I mean to say is I think the past 1 year or so (I really cannot count cos the academic year and calendar year is so different/ M3 was so long/ medschool really makes me disorientated to time, place, person at times), has made me grow and slowly roll out of my comfort zone. It’s strange to say that sitting at the table mugging is my comfort zone, but it’s what I’ve been doing for the most part of my life. So in academics, that’s defo the comfort zone. And then in M3 you just suddenly start doing things on top of reading things. I guess that’s what made the past 1 year pretty cool. Not too bad at all.

Then comes electives. I kinda anyhow chose one hahaha. I just thought I wanted to do something different from the usual and it might be interesting knowing new people. So I didn’t discuss with friends whatsoever in the decision-making. Ended up still going to travel with friends hahaha. And actually medschool is so small there’s nothing really “new” in meeting new people. Gonna trek Mt Rinjani too, and that’s outside of my comfort zone. Hope that all goes well!

I think it’s nice to know that whatever I’m doing is changing me in a good way. 🙂

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