Wafting

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So hi. I now have an awful biological clock. Thankfully it’s the holidays so burning midnight oil trying to sleep (the irony) isn’t the top of my concerns now.
I keep having flashbacks about things I thought I should have moved on from by now. Nope, it isn’t keeping me awake. Nonetheless, being awake in the middle of the night seems to be a good breeding ground for unwelcomed thoughts. You’re halfway round the world and you still occupy my thoughts sometimes. Yet I’m long ousted from any of yours.

Sigh, it’s just a sad passing phase. Flashbacks… And I constantly remind myself of the sad parts so that it’s easier to move on. Hate being so wishy-washy, but at the same time feeling some goodness in knowing that I have human emotions that I finally acknowledged.

Read a post on wongfuphil and it was quite funny. The thing about us feeling so caught up in boy/girl problems when previous generations’ problems revolved around escaping a war/survival. But just because such problems seem smaller, it doesn’t mean they aren’t valid. But yeah, they still make me feel like a weakling/noob sometimes.

Finished Eleanor and Park 2 days ago. I couldn’t put the book down! But when I did, I felt cheated somehow. Partly because the ending was kinda ambiguous. I mean I could make a decent guess but I want confirmation! Partly also because I don’t believe such love can exist… So easily. Ugh. Until the day I see/experience such love will I ever be convinced. Is it hopeless to hope?

Started on The Secret Garden. Apparently it’s children literature. Didn’t make it any easier to read. Long sentences and lots of dialogue with Yorkshire accent. But I’m not even halfway through the book, so maybe it’ll get better towards the end. I also hope I still experience the kinda magical feeling reviewers were talking about. Lemme feel like a kid again and fill me with wonder! Ok I seem desperate.

My eyes are starting to feel painful so let’s end here.

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